Today I felt like I personified the textbook example for depressed. I just feel grumpy and depressed. Look in the dictionary, there would be my picture.
I feel my control over my temperament slipping. Oops. There it goes. The only people I don't feel this towards is Josh and Tommy. Tonight I went to the store and had an unsuccessful shopping trip. I went for this, it was sold out. I went for that, it was sold out. Don't do me wrong HEB, I love this store. By the time I reached the checkout, I was in full on grump-mode. I loaded up my selections and waited. It was at this time that the cashiers were switching out for a lunch break. I stared, more like glared, as the two hormonal teenagers flirted over the drawer exchange, "tee hee, oh stop that!" Blechhh. After 5 minutes (more like 15 seconds) went by, I finally pierced the annoying adolescent banter with, "Enough, come on already!". That earned me two rude looks from the indignant punks.
This is why I know I am not ready to return to work soon. The first customer with a trivial issue, or an employee with a petty concern would not get my best dignified response.
I always joke (to myself) that I have a little man running my brain. He works all day, retrieving files from my filing cabinets in my memory, presses the correct controls to keep me in line, and helps steer me in the right direction. Sometimes I feel like he is on a coffee break, and I feel my self slipping and about to say something nasty. Just when he is savoring his sip of coffee, he realizes what is about to happen, drops the mug and dives on the EDIT button.
Right now, that little man pressed the auto-pilot button, climbed into bed and pulled the covers over his head. Boooo.
That is all. I'm tired.
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